A Day in Excalibur's Life
by Air-Siren
Summary: His story began in the 12 century you see...  Completed.
1. Chapter 1

**Arf: Don't Ask. Just Review**.

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Excalibur got out of his sword form and began to sing.

_Excalibur, Excalibur _

_From United Kingdom I'm looking for him I'm going to California_

_Excalibur, Excalibur From United Kingdom I'm looking for her I'm going to California_

He then turns back into a sword.

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**Arf: Board Shitless. **_  
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	2. Chapter 2

**Here's the long awaited part 2.**

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A fairy floated by the Sword of Excalibur, and yawned. Suddenly, Excalibur went into human form and yelled, "Fool, don't you dare fly by my sword! Now you must face your punishment of Five-hundred fools!"

"... what?" the fairy tilted her head.

Excaliber took in a deep breath and began to yell swinging his cane about, "Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! Fool! That is all!"

Excalibur turned back into sword form, while the fairy was in the fetal position, rocking back and forth.

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**Was that five hundred fools? Ah well review! Also, still bored shitless.**


	3. Chapter 3

The fairies of Excaliber's cave were all gathered around the holy sword. The fairy from the last chapter looked around and saw the deisgruntled faces of all the other fairies.

"Hey," She whispered to the fairy next her. "What's going on?"

"Excaliber is about to announce his new set of rules and guidelines that are needed to be fulfilled if he is to be claimed as a weapon." The other fairy said.

"Should he tell that to the person who draws him?"

"Well -"

"Fool!" Excaliber yelled silencing everyone. "Feel happy that I have decided to tell you all of my guidelines. Now let's begin."

"**No. 001**: My mornings start off with a cup of coffee with cream."

"Oh, god." A fairy pouted

_**(10 minutes later)**_

**"No. 022**: On a refreshing morning, start out with a refreshing greeting"

"How can a greeting be refreshing?" A fairy pondered.

**_(26 minutes later)_**

**"No. 075**: Celebrate Excalibur's birthday in grand-style"

"What does he mean by grand style?" A fairy asked

_**(1 hour and 09 minutes later)**_

**"No. 172**: Seek harmony"

"Harmonica?" Another fairy misinterprited

_**(1 hour later)**_

**"No. 278**: Never put carrots in my meals"

"If he's allergic, we should totally put them in his food," One chuckled

_**(2 hours and 54 minutes later)**_

**"No. 452**: You must attend my 5 hour story telling party"

"Does this not count?")

_**(30 minute later)**_

**"No. 500: **Always read all of Loveless' stories andreview with a 5 paragraph review."

"Who the F**k is Loveless?"

**(3 hours and 35 minutes later)**

**"No. 998**: When you order a package for home delivery, you must always use cash on delivery"

"..."

_**(8 minutes later)**_

"And that was rule 1000. Now any questio-" Excaliber looked around. "Where is everyone," he exclaimed. "They left early again! Darn faries! Oh well. I shall now sleep and begin the day anew!"

Excaliber turned into sword form and went to sleep.

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**This chapter took a total of 24 minutes. This is also the last chapter.**

**Also today is my birthday. Yay.**

**As always, review and check out all of my other stories for a good laugh.**


End file.
